After many unanswered text messages to the director of photography, I tried one more before going to bed. I woke the next day, and well into the morning there was still no reply. I could not concentrate on the rest of the shot breakdowns. I needed to know that we were going to shoot this film. Finally, I called him again and the phone seemed to ring and ring, until at last he picked up the phone. I was not sure it was him at first. He barely spoke. I talked to him and it turned out that unlike that first day when he wanted to grow the production. I suggested we shoot on a Canon Mark III, he suggested we’d shoot on 2 Black Magic Cinema cameras and create a full pulley system (which I felt was not needed) for the puppetry and shoot on some location he had in mind. Well, today, after all that, and weeks of not getting together any kind of budget or steps towards progress on his end, he dropped out.He had taken on some commercial projects and that was the end of it. So, why I wonder had he suggested I wait for him to be free by November 17th? Seriously, I wonder how much people want to destroy this project if on a subconscious level? I mean what the hell? Why did he string me along all this time? So, another door closed. Perhaps he might allow me to use some of the equipment at his disposal, but I wondered if I had the strength or funds to pull this thing together. After all that I have been through, I got slammed by that same issue that made my work in Lahore back in 2010 so difficult. “Aaap samjo aap ka kaam ho gya (consider your work done).” He didn’t use that sentence, but the results were much the same.Once again, I considered the very real possibility that I needed to pull the plug on this project, instead of continuing to do the work I was trying to finish. I sent a few messages and made a few calls to see if there were options. People encouraged me to stay and finish the project. Help was offered. I like the sound of it, but the help needs to happen, otherwise the project is still dead in the water and if I don’t finish soon, so am I. Being without money seems to be the biggest sin all over the world. To hit that point is where you will feel the disdain of society, piled high upon you. What a pathetic situation I find myself in. I fight against all odds to get this music together in Sindh where people visited my room and tried to evict me, where the people in charge of the recording space down to the gate keeper put constant pressure on me to shut down things during my recording sessions at an institute that was created to promote Sindhi culture as I worked on a project based on the greatest Sindhi poet, paying all costs to do so and support Sindhi musicians. Musicians would not rehearse, even when paid to, puppeteers were unknown to all the folk art and performing arts institutions. Yet I found them, and gathered a rag tag team, even trained with them to do something new, yet here I was. People don’t want to follow through with their word. Sure, the idea of working on something to promote your culture and art sounds nice, but why would you want to actually do that?So, I looked at ticket prices to go home. I wasn’t broke yet, and if the film was not going to happen at this time, I would be better off returning, recuperating, saving up by working at jobs, while I worked on other parts of the film and if I was foolish enough, I could return with a proper crew in place to shoot the rest of it. Sohail sahib put me in touch with another dp friend that is a mutual friend of his and Imran’s. That dp said he would drop by in the evening and there was another dp from Sohail sahib, that could be a possibility barring that. I’ll give it a bit more time, but then I’m gone. I’m hanging on, because these puppeteers are deeply impoverished. I’m trying, because this is a good project and we’ll never see anything like it waiting for some company with commercial interests to bankroll it, but I can only do so much to fight against institutions, indifference, corruption, and all that is this hellish experience of trying to make a puppet film in Pakistan.I contacted the second dp in the evening and the meeting was shifted to tomorrow evening. Well, that’s one less day before I pull the plug. Between all of this, like a badly battered machine, I continued the tedious task of breaking down shots for the film in a spreadsheet. i spoke to a few dps and consulted other production friends who were kind enough to reassure me and give me advice.